Things to start collecting for the coming fight…
Good afternoon all 👋
My husband has been very recently diagnosed. He’s had the biopsy with bone and PET scans coming in the next week.
I will be his main caregiver. I am looking for any and all advice from men who have already been there/done that…
What are things I can start gathering/ordering/sourcing to have on hand for his general comfort and well being…I know a LOT is going to depend on his options once he is staged, but surely there are some things that can be prepared now that he will need overall regardless of stage/treatment, right?
I see articles on the internet, but I’d really rather hear from the fellows in the trenches first hand🤗
Thank you so much in advance
Catherine
Hi Catherine. Not much to collect in advance other than your senses. I've had two cancers (throat and prostate... both now in remission), and I can tell you that the time period between initial diagnosis and learning how far it has spread is a difficult period of uncertainty. Let us know how things go after you find out more. Best wishes to you and your husband. Thank you for your response and well-wishes, Allen. I appreciate it very much. It is indeed a difficult time. I think he’s handling it fairly well, but he’s one of those “still waters run deep” kinda fellows so hard to gauge. I just want to do everything I can to make the coming time as comfortable and stress free as possible for him. I hope you have a long, long remission. 💕💕
Hi Catherine. I was a caregiver for my husband who was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2008 with several recurrences and with bladder cancer about five years later. I was able to think of a few things you might want to consider ahead of time. IF he has surgery, immediately following, steps were very difficult so we made arrangements for my husband to sleep on the first floor (on the couch as it was just temporary and it's comfortable) and I slept on the other couch to be near him. I had a neighbor on standby to help me when we arrived home from surgery as my husband is a big man and I wasn't able to support him physically myself. My neighbor was also on standby in the event of an emergency (to watch the dog - the kids are grown), to provide transportation if needed and to do shopping or errands I wasn't able to. I kept a written record so I would know what meds were given and what needed to be given. And just as important, pay special attention to make sure you're taking care of yourself. It's really easy to lose yourself when caring for someone else. But your ability to help him relies on your taking care of yourself. Think about the usual self care - nutrition (for both of you), exercise, rest, meditate, pray. When you can, find time for your own interests. Ask others for help. People always want to help but they don't know what to do and are often uncomfortable asking.
Best wishes to you both. I hope your husband does well with whatever treatment he has.Hi Catherine. I'm glad some of what I shared was helpful to you. I referred to my husband's prostate cancer surgery in the past only because it's been 14 years since was he diagnosed and had surgery. He's had further treatment since then but his cancer has been slow growing for the past few years so no treatment at this time. He has stage 4 prostate cancer and had a psa close to 100 when diagnosed and he is still with me 14 years later and living a good life. I hope this can be an encouragement to you and perhaps your husband. All the best to you. 💕💕💕 Thank you for sharing, Sue. Glad he is still with you 🥰
I also was diagnosed with prostate cancer. After a bone scan that proved negative, I’ve decided to have a go with hormone therapy and cyberknife radiation. I thought about removal but decided against it. I’d rather crawl than run in this instance. If it doesn’t prove effective then I’ll go for removal. Your husband sounds like he is in the same place as me in that I’ll be getting radiation sometime in mid Feb. if he decides to go the radiation route or proton therapy, ask his Dr about something called Spaceoar. It’s a sponge like device that’s inserted to prevent any leakage or misdirected radiation from getting to the colon. Best of luck and I’ll see your husband on the other side.
