Tomorrow I will be 5 weeks post Radical Prostatectomy. For the weeks and months leading up to the surgery I was eager to get to this point. The cancer is out - I can move on with my life. Then reality came calling.
During my initial visits with my Urologist Incontinence (and ED) was certainly discussed. But, given my internal urgency to 'get this out of me' the post surgery situation never really sunk in. So I don't think I was fully prepared - especially mentally - for dealing with my reality. Having to think about every move I make - do I have pads/pullups with me - is there a bathroom close. And now, just returning to work, I have to navigate meetings, non-private bathrooms (for changing if necessary), and of course the fear that everyone can see (though my clothing) what I have to do to just work a full day. And to think that this may last as much as a year is a bit much on my psyche.
Don't get my wrong - of course I'm glad that (pending my first follow up PSA) that the cancer has been delt with. But I'm prideful and control freak. Which is not a great combination when both of these have taken a huge hit.