Two hands making a heart

Selfless Sex – the Full Body

While prostate cancer may have affected your ability to perform sexually like you were able to in the past, your sex life doesn't have to end, just change a bit. With that said….

Welcome to another article on the series on Selfless Sex. Here, I’m going to discuss how the entire body can give you pleasure. Let's start by saying your body really likes to receive pleasure.

Have you ever had your hair washed and had a scalp massage? Honestly, a good scalp massage can make your toes curl! Speaking of toes, how about a good foot massage? Both feel really good, right? In other words, you can receive pleasure from head to toe. Plus, I believe the pleasure you receive coming from a person you’re intimate with will probably feel even better. Notice you’re using your hands to give pleasure, not your genitals. To take it to the next level, you can incorporate other “items” too. Let's go.

The body massage

It is important to mention “skin hunger” again, where we as humans have a strong desire to be touched and caressed. Giving your lover a full body massage goes a long way to address this issue. From time to time, I rub lotion into my lady’s skin from head to toe and judging by the sound she makes, I think she really likes it. Give your lover a foot massage. Bottom's touch. It gives a sense of intimacy and security. Our lovers like it and in the end, I think you like that feeling too.

Oral sex

Please keep in mind that Selfless Sex is about you giving your lover pleasure, much more than you are receiving. So, let’s continue with the body massage. While I totally support kissing, tasting and licking your lover, talk to them about their body.

Tell them what their body and skin feels like. Feel free to kiss random parts of their body. Allow your hands to “accidentally” brush over their nipples and genitals. Open their legs and rub lotion into their upper inner thigh, all the while telling them how sexy they are to you. Let them hear your voice.


How many of you have ever masturbated your lover in the past? Was it fun for you? Keep in mind, Selfless Sex is about giving pleasure to your lover. There are many ways for you to masturbate your partner. Using your hands is one of the best and easiest ways. Also, if you are going to masturbate your lover, please use lubrication. Dry skin-on-skin friction can be irritating and downright painful.

I have to mention sex toys. There are hundreds of sex toys out there now, for him and for her. Some look like they were created by a team of NASA engineers, while a $5 dildo will also get the job done too. It depends on what your lover likes. It is fun to go sex toy shopping. I’d suggest starting small and moving on from there.

Your senses

As I start to end this article, I’d like for you to reflect on something. Whether you realized it or not, I wanted you to be aware of using more ‘senses’ in your sexuality. The more senses you use, the better. In Selfless Sex, touch is important. Also, paying attention to your lover is very important. Listen to the sounds of pleasure she or he makes. Taste your lover as you lick and kiss them. Look at your lover’s body. Breathe them in and smell them as you kiss their body. If you’re masturbating them, did they cum? What did you see and hear when they came?

The body has so much potential for sexual pleasure, many of us only really scratch the surface. As I said to those men who are battling Prostate Cancer, your sexuality may be different than it was in the past and it doesn't have to end. Thank you.

Check out the other articles from the Selfless Sex Series:

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This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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